Really, this is our 3rd big experience, I don't count the little one's that lead to no where. One day I get a phone call from Brad asking me if I was interested in a Meth baby that was born in Vegas the beginning of July. I made the call to the caseworker involved and learn all that I can on what the situation entailed. The birthmother OD"ed on Meth and that had sent her into early delivery. The baby was far enough to be okay, but the mom had a genetic disease dealing with Polysictic kidney disease as well. So the questions I had is what is polysitic, and what does Meth do to a babies development? The agency in Utah was a private firm that was mostly LDS but they pride themselves on having better service then LDS and work quicker. (I guess) I learned that poly was a disease that gave the baby a 50/50 chance that he would get what his mother had. The disease was treatable with meds eventually. So I am put in a situation where I really feel baby desperate, so I put the issues aside only to learn that this agency is charging 40 THOUSAND dollars for this adoption case. I totally lost it on the phone! FOR WHAT? He says, well we cover the mother's expenses like rent, food, car, and delivery. Plus we have our fee's and advertising for our agency... etc. blah blah blah. He did call be later to say that he has MANY mothers in his agency looking for adopters and if I wanted a BLACK baby he would give me a discounted fee because no one in UTAH wants a black baby. Can you believe it? A black baby ONLY goes for 30 grand instead of 40. The man should be thrown in prison for selling babies and taking the adopters for all that they have!
The baby was adopted that week for 40 thousand dollars, with the family knowing that their will be a huge chance that the little boy will be delayed and may die eventually from a genetic kidney disease. BROKE my heart!
The kicker... is this same man asked me what type of baby situation I would be willing to deal with. Drugs, drinking, multi-racial, special needs ect.
I told him definitely NOT special needs or even multi-racial. Hey! I have done my homework and it would not be fair for any child to be put in any situation that would be less than ideal. I want the best for a child and I know my limits and cultural climate.
So I told him that it depended on the addiction of choice with these mothers. He told me I better reconsider my decisions because 95% of all moms that are giving their babies for adoption are in the category of the above mentioned. Really? Serious? Who are these women and What in the HELL are they thinking? Adoption can't be that hard when a mother doesn't care enough to get off her addictions during pregnancy, allow the child to become degraded and then get paid for someone to take the burden away! Am I out of line here? I hope so. Because I am sick and tired of these crappy people getting knocked up time and again and then walking away.
Now that it is said. I will not write on this again! Don't tell me that drugs and alcohol don't affect fetuses. Don't tell me I wont get a child unless I want a drugged fetus. Sheesh. MY contact with this man has ended and I wish him luck as he sells babies up in Utah!
What I learned... I don't have to adopt a baby that is so expensive and I don't have to feel like it is our only adoption option for a family!
What I hate...is having to be put in a horrible situation of convincing; that a less that perfect baby is all we can have.